Hi friends,
It’s the most positive rejections that hurt the most. When an agent or editor says they absolutely loved everything about your work but they can’t buy it anyway.
Freelancers are used to this sort of rejection; I had one just last year. It was a long-form story that everyone, from the Economist to the Guardian, said was wonderful, timely, and engaging. Most of them wanted to buy it and would have if they could. But they couldn’t. For various reasons. Money. The fact that the story was open-ended (it was about a missing boy). It would require navigating through complicated police systems and is the kind of story “we only assign to staffers.” And others.
In any case, the message is clear: You did all the right things. It’s still a no.
These rejections sting the most.
I had one of these rejections last week. The editor was lovely, wonderful, as kind as an editor can possibly be. But it was still a no. She wrote, in part: “Natasha can really, really write.”
I posted this rejection on the Bookish Pursuits group saying I felt completely defeated. And you have to give credit to the beautiful people in that group, within an hour, that thread had been derailed, the rejection was forgotten, and I was in hysterics. We’ve decided, of course, that at least one person is going to give me a blurb that says, “Natasha can really, really write.” It needs to be my Twitter bio, of course. And all the reviews need to say this, too. I think that’s going to be my tagline from now on. “Natasha can really, really write.”
You know, in the past, this would have turned into a sad and frustrating evening for me. I would have sat there stewing in the rejection, feeling sorry for myself and being unpleasant to everyone around me. I don’t take rejections personally but every now and again something comes along that feels bigger than it is. Maybe you’ve already had a bad day and this was just the last straw. Maybe it’s hitting some sort of trigger that already existed. Maybe you have a certain fear and the wording gets to you more than something else would. Maybe you’ve just had a long string of them and this one was the one that finally pushed you over the edge.
It happens. It happens to all of us. And when it does, having a supportive community, people who not only understand, but who help you get over yourself by making you laugh or see the big picture, are the kind of people you need in your corner. I’m so glad that night that I had people in my corner.
Bookish Pursuits is open to new members until the end of the month. Message me if you’re like to hear more, and if it feels like the right fit, we’d love to have you!
Cheers,
Natasha